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My friend Troy has a sister who has (huge tits). She's 4 years younger than me, although you'd never know by looking at her. (Im 40) I've always been real nice when she picks up the phone or I go over there to hang out. He's already told me that she thinks I'm nice, something she doesn't think about most boys that come over there.
Cut to Monday night. We all have Tuesday off for Veteran's day, so Troy and I are over at his house (he still lives with his mom) playing some Xbox. His sister is in the room (doing her taxes) and occasionally watching the screen as we played. Troy's mom is out running some errands; I think she was at her mother's house. The phone rings at about 8, and it's Troy's mom, Victoria. She tells Jessica (Troy's sister) that her car has broken down and needs Troy to take a look at it. Troy, being a car mechanic leaves to go check out the car, and asked me to (keep Jessica company) while he was gone, since she gets really upset by cars (she has a strange car phobia) I agree, and he leaves.
I didn't really know what to do to entertain her, so I just sat around and kind of fucked around, and would occasionally talk to her. For the most part, she sat there and played with her (hair). I was sitting at the computer working on an essay for an Archaeology class when she asked me the following:
"What are doing Mike?"
"Oh, I'm typing a paper for a class."
("Looks like a lot of work!")
"Yep, it's pretty important."
She trailed off for a minute, and I resumed typing. About 5 minutes later, she spoke again.
"Mike, I know (some kinky ass) sex" - I was taken back. What do I say to her? Do I lie, do I acknowledge that she "knows"(kinky ass) sex??
"Um, I'm not sure if we should talk about that, Jessica."
"(Try it with me, its soo good)"
"Jessica, we really shouldn't talk about this..."
"Will you try with me?"
I didn't know what to do. I was sitting there, with my mouth half opened and I'm sure there was a puddle of drool forming on the carpet pretty fast. She asked again.
"(Will you do me, you are so hot Mike)"
Fuck. Fucksticks. Fucking fuckersticks from planet fuck. I'm getting hit on by a (kinky ass) girl. What the fuck do I do?
Yeah, I fucked her. It was her first time, and she bled. It was not pleasant, and she wailed near the end, I guess an orgasm. When we were done I went to the bathroom, cleaned up, and cried. I fixed up myself and made sure she was alright. Then I went back to my essay while she did god knows what. I didn't care, I still don't. A wave of apathy crashed upon me.
Troy showed up about 10 minutes later, and I quickly excused myself to go home. I went home and cried myself to sleep on my pillow, accompanied by the horrible imagery which will haunt me to my grave. I woke up yesterday to the phone ringing, at about 7:30. Most people know to leave me alone at 7:30 when I'm not working, but I rolled over to see the caller ID. I looked down at it, saw it was Troy's house, and answered.
"Hey Mike, I need to, um well...ask you about...uh...something."
Me, suddenly awake, "Uh yeah, what's up?"
"Well, last night after I brought my mom home, Jessica was acting strangely."
"Oh, how do you mean?"
"There was blood dripping down her leg."
"What the fuck?"
"Yeah, that's what we thought, too. We are trying to figure out what happened. Do you know anything?"
"No man, I don't. That's pretty fucked up. Say, I got to go because my breakfast is burning."
"Alright Mike, I'll talk to you later."
What should I do!?? Confess to him and his mom about Jessica, keep my mouth shut? Threaten her with violence if she talks?

[LoD]Lucenthawk #239145 12/12/06 10:24 PM
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Thats pretty priceless...all things being equal.


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[LoD]Quidge #239146 12/12/06 10:29 PM
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Loses some of its hilarity because the original is gone but still hilarious.

Last edited by [LoD]Moxie; 12/12/06 10:30 PM.
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ZOMG BOOT!!
I cant beleive you made corky's sister's vagina bleed!
On a side note: Im pretty sure this is the prequal to a story Carnage wrote about saying he got sloppy seconds on some down syndromed bleeding vagina... who would of thought the story was this good!?
trolling skill +10212389

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"Fuck. Fucksticks. Fucking fuckersticks from planet fuck."
hahaha

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um a 36 year old virgin? With (big tits)?

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Quote:
um a 36 year old virgin? With (big tits)?

/signed
big tits doesnt = good looking i suppose. haha.
anyways good read. you have broken a man law tho

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*NT*

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Quote:
Threaten her with violence if she talks?

seriously? haha

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AHH a PARODY
I get it

Last edited by [LoD]Goldmund; 12/13/06 01:03 AM.
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